I’m sure you’ve seen this before. It’s super cute on cupcakes that look like flower pots and the like. But for today, HALLOWEEN, I was going for creepy. Ew.

Ingredients:
Chocolate cake
Chocolate frosting
Crushed chocolate cookie crumbs
Chocolate sprinkles
Gummi worms

Start by baking a chocolate cake. I don’t think I need to give you a recipe here, just make a nice regular old one. Also make a batch of chocolate frosting.

Frost the cake and ready your decor. I like to use crushed up cookies for the ‘dirt.’ Just crush up a bunch of Oreos, then throw them in the blender. Yes, cream filling and all.

I also like to add chocolate sprinkles to make it look like little pebbles. Gummi worms are the final creepy touch. You can totally creep this up by adding ‘gravestones’ and even the hands coming out of the ground. A great quick idea is to use Milanos, brilliant!

Again, I didn’t want it too freaky, cause these kids are only 3 years old. Let’s not go nuts. I don’t want to deal with nightmares at 2am, thanks.

With the weather getting colder, now, I can turn my attention back to warming up the kitchen. This hit the spot.
ingredients:
1 roasted chicken, deboned and cut into chunks
2 bell peppers, diced – (I like the colorful ones)
1 onion, diced
3/4 cup frozen corn
2 cans kidney beans (I drain half the liquid)
2 (8 ounce) cans tomato sauce
2 cups water
2 teaspoons chili powder
1 tablespoon dried parsley
1 teaspoon garlic powder
1/2 teaspoon ground cayenne pepper (I leave this out, cause of the kiddies)
1/2 teaspoon ground cumin
2 tbs olive oil

Pour olive oil in a pot and place over medium-high heat. Add bell peppers and onion until tender. Stir in corn, beans, tomatoes, tomato sauce and water. Season with chili powder, parsley, garlic powder, cayenne and cumin. Reduce heat, cover and simmer 30 minutes.

Add the pre-cooked chicken. YES I AM LAZY. I used a roasted chicken from the store, so easy! Yes, it’s half cheating since I bought the chicken pre-roasted, but Rachael Ray, I am not. I mean, would I wear eyeliner that dark? Seriously what the f with her face? I mean, I love Joy Division too, but damn.

Seriously, could this be any easier? So easy I only have one picture!

I get inspired by walking through the market which is why I always leave with 50 more things than I went in for. The other day I saw a WHOLE TURKEY BREAST. At first I thought that was weird, then again I thought maybe I could feed all of us and more with just that…
ingredients:
1 whole turkey breast (I found this in the fresh meat section of Trader Joe’s)
1 teaspoon dried thyme
1/2 teaspoon pepper
1/4 teaspoon garlic powder
1/8 teaspoon onion powder

olive oil
butter

Preheat oven to 325 degrees. Line a shallow pan with non-stick foil. Now you can prep the turkey by rinsing and patting dry, but the new FDA guidelines are saying this is a no no due to cross contamination. Either way, it’s your funeral.

Loosen the skin a little from the turkey. Rub the outside and under the skin with olive oil. Combine all the dry ingredients, rub on the outside (bottom and top) and under the skin. Put the turkey breast side up on in the pan. If you have a wire rack, then good for you, use that. I don’t. Now dot the top with butter, this will give a lovely brown color.

If you have a thermometer, go ahead, use it. I just don’t feel like it. I never do. Put the pan in the oven and roast for 2-1/2 hours. Take the turkey out, let it rest for 20 minutes, then carve it up!

I served it with rice because my children are freaks and do not like potatoes. I know, they should be disowned but I’ve grown fond of them so I’ll keep ‘em for now. Those little potato hating heathens. All in all the turkey was a good lead up to a ‘real’ one on Thanksgiving, and I even got a – “WOW. Mommy! This turkey tastes sooo GOOD.”

I LOVE caramel apples. I thought I’d try and make my own, and damn was it easy. I really wanted ‘lady apples’ the super tiny ones, but just regular old little ones were all I could find. Still, they came out darn cute. And yummy.
Ingredients:
apples (20 mini ones or 10 regular sized ones)
sticks
2 bags of caramels
4 Tablespoons water
toppings

Wash and dry your apples. Ready a sheet of wax paper by buttering it, this will prevent stickage later when you’re done with the caramel.

Put the sticks into the tops of the apples. I used lollipop sticks cause I like the thinness of them. But popsicle sticks will work as well. Just push them down about 3/4 of the way into the core. They should go in easily.

Put the caramels and the water in a pan. On low to medium heat, stir and wait for the caramel to melt.

As you can tell, I like to mise en place the crap out of things. It makes things easier down the line. ANYWAY, lay out your toppings. I used sprinkles since these were for kids. Otherwise, nuts, chocolate chips, marshmallows, really anything you can think of can be rolled onto the apples.

Once the caramel has melted and is smooth, simply take the apple and dip it into the caramel in one smooth motion, letting the excess drip off. I suggest lightly scraping the bottom of the apple, as the caramel will slide down anyway.

Working fast, quickly move to the toppings and roll the apple until it is covered. Set the apples down on the buttered wax paper and let them rest. Put them in the fridge til you are ready to serve. These small ones make really cute treats for the toddler set.

This is a super quick dessert, great for parties because it looks like you worked really hard, when you in fact, did not.

ingredients:
3 pints of strawberries
3 bags of chocolate chips
1 tablespoon vegetable oil

Wash and throroughly dry your stawberries. Water and chocolate do not mix, so just set them out on some paper towels while you ready the rest of the stuff. Line a cookie sheet with wax paper, this is where the strawberries will be put once the chocolatizing has occurred.

I usually prefer to use higher grade chocolate, but in a pinch, chocolate chips will do. Who doesn’t love chocolate chips?? My son is allergic to chocolate, so white chocolate works well too, for those who care.

If you don’t have a double boiler, just put a metal mixing bowl, or bigger saucepan, on top of another saucepan. The smaller saucepan (on the bottom) – fill with water and bring to a low boil. Add the chocolate and stir well. It should melt slowly. Add in the oil – the oil gives the chocolate shine and lucidity that you need to coat the strawberries.

Once the chocolate has completely melted, take the strawberries and dip them. Lay them down on the lined cookie sheet to harden. You can dip anything really. Try the following:

marshmallows
cookies
pineapple
pretzels

Anything dipped in chocolate is good. Well, maybe not fish, but you get the picture.